Christmas and memory of loved ones: church rules and folk traditions

REMEMORATION FOR CHRISTMAS: A BRIEF GUIDE

January 7 — Christmas. A holiday of joy. But what about those who miss their departed loved ones?

Is it possible to remember? Go to the cemetery? What prayers to read?

MosGupRitual answers the main questions.

What the church says

Christmas is a celebration of life, not death. Therefore, church funeral services are not performed on these days.

But this does not mean that you cannot remember loved ones.

What you can:

• Pray at home — in your own words or according to a prayer book
• Light a candle — at home or in church
• Give alms — in memory of the deceased
• Remember with a kind word — talk about him loved ones
• Post a photo as a reminder

What is not accepted:

• Ordering funeral services — they are not served until the end of the holiday
• Arranging a wake with crying is contrary to the spirit of the holiday
• Indulging in despondency — Christmas calls for joy

MosGupRitual reminds: commemoration is not only sorrow. This is gratitude.

Cemetery for Christmas

Is it possible? There is no strict prohibition. But the church does not encourage it.

Why:

• Christmas is a time for church and family
• There are special days for visiting graves — Parents' Saturdays, Radonitsa
• A trip can distract from the main thing — the joy of the holiday

If you still go:

• Do not arrange a wake at the grave
• Clean up, light a candle
• Pray briefly
• Keep peace in your soul

What prayers to read

A simple prayer:

“Rest, O Lord, the soul of Your departed servant (name), and forgive him all his sins, and grant him the Kingdom of Heaven.”

You can also:

• Psalm 91
• “Rest with the saints…”
• Prayer in your own words
• Akathist for the same deceased

The main thing is sincerity. It is not necessary to know all the texts. It’s enough just to talk to God about the one you love.

When to commemorate in a church way

Nearest Parental Saturdays in 2026:

• February 22 — Ecumenical (meat-free)
• March 15, 22, 29 — Saturdays of Lent
• April 28 — Radonitsa
• June 14 — Troitskaya
• November 1 — Dimitrievskaya

On these days, you can order a memorial service, submit notes, visit the cemetery.

Folk traditions

On Christmastide (January 7–19) in Rus' it was customary:

• Leave a place at the table for the deceased
• Put a treat on the window
• Tell children about your ancestors
• Light a candle in the window

These are not church rules, but good customs that help preserve memories.

The main thing

Christmas is a holiday of love. And love for the departed is part of this love.

Don’t be afraid to remember. Don't be afraid to pray. Don't be afraid to be bored. This is fine. It's humane. This is right.

MosGupRitual wishes you a Merry Christmas!

May the holiday bring light to your homes. Let the memory of loved ones warm you. Let faith give hope.

Merry Christmas! Eternal memory to our loved ones.

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